Thursday, August 23, 2012

Job wanted

Recently I playfully asked Mr. LBF a very honest and truthful question. Not to my surprise he responded very honest and maybe a little too truthful. I asked "so if there was one thing that only you do for our household, that you wish we could share, what would it be?". He looked up at me and said "bringing in more income".... Ouch.... it stung.... then he asked "what was yours"?
"Lactating....I was gonna say lactating......".
Talk about taking the wind from my sails. I immediately started naming off all the reasons I do not have a job that brings in income and we nodded in agreement like we always do when the subject comes up. The biggest reason being of course money. We have looked into my working outside the home and as many family's have figured out I would basically only be making enough to cover our childcare and the phone bill. Plus the cost of our kids coming home to an empty house is way too high for me. When we got married and had "insta family" we knew that I would be taking on the role of SAHM. By the way I had no idea what that meant till I saw it used by someone else on FB and had to go to the urban dictionary to look it up. It stands for Stay At Home Mom, and Sh!t A$$ Mother F*cker. In this context we will be using the first definition.

I will also note at this point, that I know without a doubt that Mr. LbF does not for a second take my "job" for granted. He also lets me know that I am more than welcome to come up with my million dollar idea that we can sell in infomercials anytime. He will be more than happy to step aside as breadwinner.

With all that said the question of what to do with my days when Shemp enters the school age is still a mystery. From the time I was fourteen I have always worked. The number of jobs I have had is a running joke in my family. I helped run an after school program when I met Mr. LbF. At that point in time I had already sold shoes, cleaned houses and toilets, been a checker, model, fed hens and walked dogs. I delivered pizzas in the snow, and sprayed out bowling shoes in the summer. I was a telemarketer for a minute and a half and played Nanny for a month. All the while waitressing at whatever restaurant would have me. We had Larry and I decided to sell Pampered Chef, that was fun but then we had Curly. So I got a job at the PX and counted movies. Then we had Moe, and there really was no time to do anything but keep her from getting into stuff.
It is always about the time I am due to give birth that I find myself sifting through the want ads. By far the thing I enjoyed the most was being a waitress. I like people and food. My pipe dream has always been to have a bakery cafe with my best friend Kimberly. She is an amazing cook and baker. When ever I really hit one out-of-the-park with a meal, my family tells me I need to put it on our menu!

But back to my dilemma. What to do what to do? Waayy back in high school they had us fill out one of those career assessments that matched your answers with those of professionals. I remember my top two that I matched with were pro-baseball player and Rabbi. It was then I stopped filling out college applications.  I was on the road to be an innovator. - - - I just had to spell check the hell out of that......

Let's access, I am really good at making a mean pot of soup and cute babies. Womb for rent?
It is always easier to decide what you don't want to do. So I here's my list:  I don't want to demonstrate, discover, diagnose, or dance.

I just watched a guy run a backhoe in my front yard, and all I could think of was" I could totally do that"....
And thanks to God's promise that I have divine purpose I just might!


P. S
The backhoe operator said no......