Monday, February 12, 2018

Prescription Needed

Social media-MD I need your help! I'll go through my symptoms and you can give your best educated guess as to what is ailing me.

I seem to bruise more easily.
I have started to use the word 'sensible' when looking for footwear.
Leaving the house I either look homeless or put together, there is no in-between.
I notice how not-white my teeth are compared to others.
My childhood dream of becoming a world famous ballerina is looking less likely of coming true.
I skipped a pedicure recently not because I had forgotten to shave my legs but because I had not shaved my left big toe.
I work really hard on my marriage because a 'revenge body' is way out of reach at this point.
Sunscreen is my cosmetic of choice.
I recently referred to newlyweds as 'just babies'.
As I type this my right eye keeps closing so that the words stop moving all over the screen and my leg fell asleep.

Taking in all the facts, if your diagnosis is that it's my 37th birthday you are correct! I am off to fill my prescription of red wine, antacids and smooth move tea!